While ghosting is never pleasant, being semi-ghosted by someone can be even worse. Between flagrant lack of interest and long response times, here are the signs that show that you are the victim of semi-ghosting.
According to the Cambridge Dictionary, ghosting is “a way to end a relationship with someone suddenly by ending all relationship with them”. While ghosting can make it harder to mourn a relationship – whether romantic, friendly or familial – a 2014 survey by YouGov America showed that 15% of women surveyed had already been ghosted, compared to 11% of men. An increasingly common practice in the era of social networks and digital.
Very similar to ghosting, another practice is just as destructive: semi-ghosting. But what is it exactly? The “semi-ghost” is actually a formerly close relationship that is still superficially present, but the frequency and depth of contacts are so lacking that the relationship is almost, if not totally non-existent. Like ghosting, this practice can be applied in romantic, friendly, family or even professional relationships.
But unlike ghosting, semi-ghosting can seem more elongated in time, because the person is always more or less there, and therefore more painful. And that leaves you in an in-between where you can no longer find yourself. “Maybe the regular dates, phone calls and messages have dried up, but there are still the occasional contacts, leaving you wondering where you are and even if you are in a relationship or a friendship.“, indicates the magazine Stylist.
Why do people half disappear?
Semi-ghosting can start when life situation changes (marriage, new job, move), tensions or unacknowledged personal problems or lack of interest or time.
But not all motivations are not necessarily malicious : “Sometimes people are half ghost ’cause they’re really busyrecalls the magazine. We all have times in our lives when it’s hard to stay on top of everything and they can just prioritize other things for a while.“
Semi-ghosting can have a negative impact on self-esteem and make you feel like you’ve been rejected or you’ve done something wrong, but that situation isn’t always up to you. It’s up to you whether you want to let the relationship go awry or face your half-ghost and figure out why they’re acting the way they are. In the meantime, here are the signs that show you’re semi-ghosted.
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2/6 –
Your interlocutor takes a long time to answer
One hour, then two, then four… Your messages go (too) long without a response. With each message or call, your contact takes hours or even days to respond. By force, you got used to it but wouldn’t that show a problem in the relationship?
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3/6 –
He pretends he doesn’t have time
Again, it’s a matter of priorities in your relationship: when asked about this lack of presence, the semi-phantom may claim to be busy, preoccupied. But strong relationships prioritize making time for each other.
© Shutterstock / Cast Of Thousands
4/6 –
Your conversations are casual, brief and superficial
Once you (finally) manage to get in touch with your semi-ghost, the exchanges are short – just a few messages are enough – and mostly superficial, with basic exchanges and questions. A text, a like, a voice note… Even the absence of these small acts shows the distance of your relationship.
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5/6 –
Your half-ghost never initiates contact
You are always the initiator of your appointments (which almost never go through) and you have the feeling that if you don’t write to him, you may not hear from him for a while. Ask yourself if the other prioritizes your relationship or if it tends to become one-sided.
© Shutterstock / Maridav
6/6 –
How to reconnect a relationship with a semi-ghost?
If the semi-ghost takes a step towards you, do not close automatically. Stay open while being mindful of your sanity: Accept that you don’t control their decisions and you can’t force them to say why they’re semi-ghosting you. Continue to live your life on your side and let him manage his return.
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